We had a roommate like this. Now, I'm not always the best about keeping the fridge cleaned out, but this was ridiculous. She'd come knocking on my door asking if I'd seen her leftovers I'd just finally thrown out after ten or fifteen days of rattling around and taking up space. Then she'd act all pouty and whine… » 10/23/14 5:55pm Yesterday 5:55pm

I would absolutely love to have streams of kids from all fucking over lining up at my door on Halloween night! There aren't enough kids in my neighborhood and there are more upscale neighborhoods pretty close to us so I imagine a lot of them go there. I mean, I know of a street not far from us full of elderly people… » 10/23/14 1:46pm Yesterday 1:46pm

I can't figure out how to get Little to break up with her boyfriend without making it a command, which I'm not going to do. There's nothing particularly wrong with him, we just feel like the relationship has run its course and it's time to move on. He lives a good 15 miles away and 9 times out of 10 we're the ones… » 10/22/14 7:53pm Wednesday 7:53pm

I got drugged at a friend's party with my husband. My husband was drunk and I didn't even realize there was anything wrong, so I drove 15 miles home in the middle of the night. The next morning, I discovered I'd fractured my foot falling out of the hot tub while blacked out shortly before we left. I can't believe… » 10/22/14 6:11pm Wednesday 6:11pm

My husband is a lot like my (step)dad. I didn't expect him to be, because on the surface they're completely different. That makes it feel less weird, I think. They both love working with their hands, getting dirty, but both went into non-physical fields. They have the same lightly-self-deprecating sense of humor. … » 10/22/14 11:59am Wednesday 11:59am

Asking for help. How do people do that? I'll muddle and scrape through nearly goddamn anything myself just not to have to ask for help. Sometimes I can accept it when it's offered though! There is a benefit, at least; I can get shit done like nobody's business. I'm the greatest employee anyone will ever have. Until I… » 10/22/14 11:19am Wednesday 11:19am

My mom rattles on constantly about our extended family, and I couldn't care less if I were dead. Her dad had a ton of sibling who all had a ton of kids and so on. Somehow she is made aware of and remembers every fucking inane detail of all of their lives and feels compelled to pass it on. I grew up being forced to… » 10/21/14 5:13pm Tuesday 5:13pm

I (and many others, apparently) am shocked that you're cool with ottowan posting this info here. Publicly available or not, having it all clearly plastered here in the comments is not cool. Most sane people would not have gone looking for it, but how it's just right there smackin' you in the face. » 10/21/14 4:28pm Tuesday 4:28pm

I've been hooking mine behind my back since I started wearing bras with hooks, but was also recently told this is wrong. Supposedly it stretches the band out? I'm really good at it though, and I hold the clasp close to my body when I hook it, so I don't *think* it's getting stretched. I started hooking in front and… » 10/21/14 2:54pm Tuesday 2:54pm

Some genius cracked that "upper hand" joke as LordSparrow and I were cutting our cake. I saw the flash of the photographer's camera go off from the corner of my eye as I threw my harshest death glare at whoever it was. I'm pretty disappointed we didn't get that photo. » 10/20/14 4:45pm Monday 4:45pm

I my mom's set of Wusthof, but I really love Shun. Definitely a splurge, but they're wonderful. They're Japanese and have a thinner blade with a narrower angle on the cutting edge than Wusthof or other German brands. I use my santoku from them for nearly everything. » 10/20/14 12:49am Monday 12:49am

I need new pants because all of mine are getting baggy on me and I've just recently embraced how good I look in tight skinny jeans. Also, I can suddenly flip food around in my giant wok like it's no big deal. Or, actually like it is a big deal, because I totally made Lord and Little stop what they were doing to come… » 10/18/14 3:04pm Saturday 3:04pm

LittleSparrow has had different shades of neon and candy-colored hair for a couple years now, and she gets the most positive feedback from older people out in public. It's freaking awesome when a gray-haired lady comes speeding over with her walker to rave about how wonderful her hair is and praise her for fully… » 10/17/14 5:28pm 10/17/14 5:28pm